This is not for sure yet just in the works at the moment but ia m thinking of it


Name: Gatekeeper
sex: male
age: 20
looks: His body color is the kind of a key
Species: Flutter
powers: Utter flutter also an ability to use sticks needls and other things for lock picking
Eye color; His aculy eye is black but his eyeres insted of black is white. Some genatic defect

History: He was born a few years before the great death he watched his family die and somehow he got afected by some part of it that afteced his eyes. He can't see colors he can see body heat and thats how he sees he can watch the heart beat. He got the name Gatekeeper from the odd gate symbole on his hip but what also got him named that his the abilty to use his utter flutter to acully make keys from sticks and cearten rocks like shale and quarts. Much is not really known about him but he does not hide in the shadows. He stays in the open thinking in the darkness he will be harmed but in the open he will be safe.

Ok this is the finel on the charecter so please rewview him

Name: Lorekeeper
age: 20
species: Seapony
looks: Pure blue with white dots all over his tail and in the middle of his head is a gem it allows him to deciver words long dead in the toungh of others.
hobbies: Hes the keeper of the lore[if thats alright]
ability: He has the abilty to read others species laung
History: He likes to be by himself its rare to see him outside of his home. He loves to read. Not much is really known about him they just call him the lorekeeper he has no other name or at least he dosent rember his other name. Because its been awhile since he heard it. All he ever has known is books and lore.


Now if your wondering why i changed it from gatekeeper to lorekeeper because I was thinking about it more thats why i said i am not sure if he was my new one yet. So i thought a bit about it and then i thought this one through.

I'm sorry Mega, I'm going to be blunt. This doesn't make any sense. What is he the Lorekeeper of? How can he read underwater? I don't believe we have seaponies set up as a culture that writes things down.

Is he a G3? If not, then he can't have white, well maybe as small spots...(other MODs?) and what shade of blue?

First off, PLEASE spell check and grammar check your work for a character submission. Secondly, what do you mean by this? That he can read all types of writing?

Again spell check and check your grammar. Grammar Help We can not have a character's history that isn't explained at all. At least the MODs need to know who he is, where's he come from etc. So we can make sure it doesn't conflict with the rest of EOD history and any plans we may have concerning the EOD storyline.

So you really need to take a moment to think about him, okay? He could be a neat character but ot be honest I think you're just creating him to RP with the rest of us in the seapony RP. That can be cool, but you need ot make a better effort at this character. Mispellings, incomplete sentences, and "he doesn't remember.." history makes me think you slapped him together no matter how you may say you didn't.

Take some time to read over your character. Think about why you want to make him, what is his purpose and where you'll be playing him. Then copy/paste the CS into a word program (like Microsoft Word) and do a quick spell check. Then post the updated sheet as a new post so We can see the changes.

I know you can do better than this, Mega so show me your great creativity while giving me those lovely complete sentences I know you can do!

Name: lorekeeper
Sex: male
age: 20
species: Seapony
Looks: Pure blue with white speckles
Eye color: light blue
History: He comes from a long line of history lovers. His family grew to love books so much they begain to write what they see. They write useing their mind by useing a gem thats imbeded in their foreheads. When one dies they remove the gem from the dead one and imbed in their yougest baby. They take on the one who came before them. If the gem is removed it would mean death. Because all the skills of breathing, swimming, eating, and talking would be taken away.

Power of the gem: The gem holds the thoughts and memmeries of ones that came before it. [Like i said before] They see nightmares dreams love ones even see the flash of the others death. Thats the only uses of the gem other then useing it to write on cearten flat objects like rocks. The gem is round like an oval it places itself on the frontel lobes. If its removed [becomes like a person who lost everything in a car crash unless its put back before 2 hours]

Now i hope this is ok jenn if not we can talk about it also give me a sight for a spell check because I don't have one anymore.

Hi Mega..

The first thing that stands out to me is books underwater.. equals pulp. Another thing that pops up is, if they are the only ones in the entire seaworld that can do this... where would they get the written language from? It takes many generations to develope such a thing and if they are the ones that will ever be able to benefit from this, I wonder what the point would be.

I also ask you, if the character never leaves his house... then what fun would he be to play?

The problem with the seaponies writing is the how's... they couldn't use ink for obvious reasons. Using a method of scratching their letters would be difficult too. They would have to scratch rocks which would be very hard on their mouths and teeth.

Your character does bring up a part of the sea kingdom that no one has touched on.. how do they pass on teachings through time? So perhaps you'd like to bring up that topic in the developement thread.

As far as this character goes though... It seems to me that this character would be better suited as a NPC. A character the sea ponies rely on when they need help with lore, history, etc...

I would not recomend this kind of character.

Alright So i will just forget this one and think of something else later.